Jesse Santoyo

So my wife went to get a pedicure this evening, me and Diego chose to get some groceries at Publix. So we did our usual racing through the aisles and not being the safest people, but we were having a blast. Diego loves when we drive the shopping cart on two wheels, he totally goes nuts for it…Yeah I know its not the safest thing. Well after stocking on some expensive baby cra…”food” and adult proteins we left to find momma. She was just about finished. Then it happened….”jesse! you should get a pedicure!” NO WAY! Thats been the story for a few years now. She is dying for me to get a pedicure. NO WAY. Can you picture me on that chair with some lady cleaning my feet…heck nah. Finally I gave in to the idea. Maybe she’ll stop asking if I do this foot enlightenment ritual and the pleading will end after years in trial. AS I sat there (by the way that massage chair was good if nothing else came out of the pedicure the chair was worth it) Some kid working on the feet next to mine says, “you’d be surprised how many swole muscle dudes get pedicures.” Dude I don’t care if UFC fighters get pedicures it ain’t for me, Im doing this cause my wife insisted. So then the lady assigned to maneuvered my feet says, “you should get your eye brows done…YOU GOTTA BE OUTTA YOUR MIND!!!! Lets get this foot thing done, happy wife, happy feet and close this chapter for good. So I got suckered in to this premium pedicure….what a waste. Reina was gone by then..but they saw it all over my face…SUCKER…I didn’t know what I was ordering, before you know it I had green gook on my chins and calves, and it burned, then they slapped my feet with sand soap or something…maybe salt from the middle east. The massage wasn’t too bad, regardless when you have this middle age lady playing with my feet in public surrounded by old dudes saying, “you like”? Yeah.. tell me about it. Masculinity down the drain…but its the price you pay to please the wife. Babe I won’t do it again but you’re right its not that bad…but my masculinity was compromised! No offense to the muscle dudes that get pedicures, but that chair is no place for any man…lol  

And while all this is going on Pat Riley is resigning on TV… What the heck is going on? Temporary Nirvana until he finds Jesus…with a Chicago team…Miami you’re my home and I love you to death…but the Cubs, bears and Bulls are my peeps. NO hard feelings… Phil…let the wars begin….hahah

Be well MIA…

-fuser+